Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Who would be a better President? Hillary Clinton or a box of Cheez-its?

A scientific study of mine:

Hillary: Is a supporter of the war in Iraq, at least when it's quasi-popular to take such a stance.

Cheez-its: Is a supporter of the war against hunger between that obnoxious 4-6 hour gap between lunch and dinner.

Advantage: Cheez-its


Hillary: Waffles on the issue of "partial-birth" abortion.

Cheez-its: Doesn't go well with waffles.

Advantage: Draw


Hillary: Costs $400,000.

Cheez-its: Costs $3.

Advantage: Cheez-its


Hillary: Wastes thousands of federal dollars to go on trips to Iraq and Israel, despite the fact that she could easily pay for those trips herself.

Cheez-its: Just sits there.

Advantage: Cheez-its


Hillary: Supports health care for all Americans.

Cheez-its: Supports a continuation of America's status as the most overweight nation on earth.

Advantage: Hillary


Hillary: Has such a large lead in the Democratic primary, she can taste victory.

Cheez-its: Tastes like cheezy goodness.

Advantage: Cheez-its


Overall Advantage: A tough choice indeed, but with a margin of 4-1, I'm going with Cheez-its for President.

2 comments:

~dani said...

Upon reading this blog post, the following discussion took place...

Whitney: i like the individual bags though
Dani: i think all the rules still apply
Whitney: they would have to specify but the picture is of the box
Whitney: and they get stale
Whitney: so does hilary but whatever, its not my joke, i won't take it
Dani: apparently so does hillary
Dani: hahahaha

Jack said...

LOL. I just noticed that.

Whitney ftw, apparently.